I marked an "X" on April 22nd, 2018 in my calendar. I had decided that this was going to be my last day.
I look back on that statement today and it seems so surreal. What was I thinking? How had life come to this point in time where I seriously had contemplated suicide?
I feel it important to preface why I'm sharing such a personal account of my life. I struggled for some time on whether to post this but in the end I thought this was too important not to share.
I recently went through an important exercise about "Finding Your Why" a book written by Simon Sinek . My girlfriend and I spent the better part of a weekend, recounted the stories of our lives that have had a great and profound impact upon who we are today. While one of us shared the stories, the other took extensive notes and probed into getting to the hidden meaning behind the story. These stories, some good and some bad, have shaped me into who I am today. What I discovered upon recalling these anecdotes, were themes and characteristics that have been pretty consistent for the past 10 years. At the end of our storytelling, we both came to the conclusion that my why was "To communicate the lessons learned from my past experiences so that others will thrive in their lives and minimize the impact of their setbacks." In my personal life, I feel it is my responsibility to share what we went through with Maddie and hopefully other parents can learn from our experiences. In my business, The Finish Line Group, I help educate business owners to avoid the same fate that I experienced with my first company so others need not make the same avoidable mistakes. As a result, I feel compelled to share my experiences: the good, the bad and sometimes the scary.
" I could actually relate to what Maddie must’ve been feeling on April 10, 2015"
"My current state didn’t represent my future state"
If you know anyone who has been struggling please share this and be aware that even those who we believe are the soundest of mind, the kindest of heart and the most spirited in life all are vulnerable and susceptible to deep emotional pain. Let's not let the outer persona mask the inner turmoil. Probe beyond the pleasantries, care deeply and lend a helping hand always, for this could make all the difference to someone who needs it most.
If you are looking to "Find Your Why", I encourage you to watch Simon Sinek's TED Talk on "Finding Your Why". I hope you find it as inspiring as I found it.